PARENTING ADVOCATE WHO DEFINED
"DADDYING MOVEMENT" HONORED AS "LIVING TREASURE"
BY MOTHERING MAGAZINE
DADS Unlimited and REEL FATHERSTM Founder Recognized for Extraordinary Efforts to Expand and Deepen Definition of What it Means to Be a Father
Washington, DC -- May 28, 2008 -- Allan
Shedlin has been called many things during his four decades as an
exuberant dad, and more recently as a granddad.
Parenting coach, educator, writer, social commentator, father
of three, "Grampsy" of five, and the man who defined the term
"daddying." For his continued efforts to raise awareness of what he calls
the "Daddying Movement" and to encourage men of
all ages and walks of life to stay involved in the lives of their
children from infancy through adulthood, Mothering magazine
has bestowed upon Shedlin perhaps his most unexpected designation:
"Living Treasure."
"We
are in the throes of a social revolution that holds exceptional
promise for children and families, one that is redefining what it
means to be 'masculine' -- revisiting silently accepted
stereotypes and traditions restricting fathers' roles to 'breadwinner' and
'disciplinarian,'" said Shedlin, founder
of two fatherhood organizations DADS Unlimited (www.daddying.com)
and REEL FATHERS (www.reelfathers.com).
"The Daddying Movement has expanded the roles
of fathers to include 'nurturer' and 'work-at-home dad,'
causing reverberations in family dynamics and the broader culture.
In unprecedented numbers, fathers are discovering that by nurturing
their children, they are nourishing themselves."
As if to document the
Movement's existence and with a touch of irony, Mothering
editors honored Shedlin as a "Living Treasure" for its May-June
issue, which arrived on newsstands the week before Mothers' Day.
The issue also includes a special father-focused editorial by
Mothering editor and publisher Peggy O'Mara in her regular
"A Quiet Place" column at the front of the magazine.
"When I heard Allan tell the stories of the fathers and children he had interviewed, and speak so movingly about what he calls 'the Daddying Movement,' I realized that what he was saying was what other daddies had been trying to tell me," said O'Mara in her editorial column. "There is a new generation of fathers who are not second-class parents to their wives. They are fully present and know what to do. Just like mothers, they have to figure things out for themselves and learn from their mistakes, but more of them than ever are willing to show up and get involved."
Inspired by what she calls a "new awareness," O'Mara said that her publication would be taking immediate steps to include more content from and images of dads in its pages, including developing a new "In His Own Words" department, which will include a short dad interview with photo; publishing more articles by dads; and developing more content and facilitating interactive forums for daddies at www.mothering.com.
Shedlin
believes that the Daddying Movement has remained "under the radar" because it has
occurred without a perceived "injustice," and its very existence
defies some basic male stereotypes about how a male-led movement
evolves: there is no strategic plan, no in-your-face tactics, and no
single, identifiable leader. Rather,
it has been inadvertent, gentle, and it has occurred one dad and one
child at a time.
"Today's dads are not likely to be asked the question I was asked more than 40 years ago when I brought my one-year-old daughter to the local playground in my New York City neighborhood: 'Are you babysitting today?'" said Shedlin. "Today's dads are dramatically more present in playgrounds, in pre-natal and parenting classes, at school conferences and events, at library story hours, as well as pushing strollers and carrying their infants in baby carriers."
Shedlin
coined the term "daddying" more than a decade ago to describe
the active, involved exuberance of his parenting, and the parenting
of other men he knew. Distinct from "fathering," a one-time,
biological act requiring no greater commitment than a bit of DNA,
"daddying" conveys the lifelong process of embracing
responsibilities for the physical, emotional, social, intellectual,
creative, moral and spiritual well-being of children.
"At first, when I told friends I wanted to use the word daddying, they cringed and warned me that it sounded wimpy," said Shedlin. "Experience has shown the opposite to be true. To the more than 90 men I've interviewed, daddying does not imply a loss of masculinity. It's helped them acknowledge the tenderness they feel to their children, and given them permission to get in touch with their nurturing side. Becoming a parent changes one's identity instantly and forever. The new word not only captures that fundamental change, but also embodies the realization that fathers matter – in their presence as well as their absence."
In November 2007, Shedlin's outreach efforts through DADS Unlimited gave rise to REEL FATHERS, a grassroots organization that uses the power of cinema and reflective activities to honor and celebrate a diverse population of involved fathers, and to heal, renew, and deepen the lifelong connection between fathers and children – supporting stronger, more stable family relationships. Currently, REEL FATHERS is designing a number of pilot programs that can be replicated nationally.
Beginning this June, using its unique basic formula of father-centered movies and videos coupled with reflection and other creative responses, REEL FATHERS will partner with greater Santa Fe community-based organizations, such as Big Brothers Big Sisters, Head Start, Warehouse 21 (Santa Fe-area teen art center), Native American pueblos, and the Santa Fe Film Festival.
Working across the full socio-economic spectrum, and establishing key connections within the community, REEL FATHERS will also reach specific target populations with its programs, including children ages 4-5 and 6-12, teens, disadvantaged and at-risk youth, men in correctional institutions, military dads, Hispanic and Native American men and their families. Building upon these ongoing partnerships, REEL FATHERS is working toward its inaugural REEL FATHERS Film Festival in the greater Santa Fe and Albuquerque, New Mexico area in June 2009.
# # #
About Allan Shedlin, DADS Unlimited & REEL FathersTM
DADS
Unlimited
LLC
(www.daddying.com) is dedicated to
demystifying parenting and developing a comprehensive range of
practical services and resources that support parents.
Its focus is on enabling fathers to become the lifelong dads
they want to be, and that kids want and need them to be.
Based in suburban Maryland, DADS
Unlimited teaches dads the art and craft of "daddying"
-- a
father's (or surrogate father's) active, lifelong commitment to
his child's physical, emotional, social, intellectual/creative,
and moral/spiritual well being.
REEL FathersTM is a grassroots organization whose mission is
to use the power of cinema and reflective activities to honor and
celebrate involved fathers, and to heal, renew, and deepen the
lifelong connection between fathers and children -- supporting
stronger, more stable family relationships.
Working with a variety of community-based organizations and
businesses, REEL FATHERS helps design creative programs and tailor
them to suit local cultures and sensibilities.
For more information, please visit www.reelfathers.com.
Before launching DADS
Unlimited and REEL Fathers, Allan
Shedlin, Jr., founded and served for a decade as Executive Director
of the New York-based National Elementary School Center (NESC) -- an organization dedicated to the optimal development and learning of
every child and to helping professionals, parents, and the public
address children’s needs. Prior
to that, Shedlin was principal of New York City's Ethical Culture
School for eight years. Through his national consulting, frequent broadcast
interviews, speaking engagements, and published commentary, he has
steadily established a broad national platform as an authority on
parenting, education, and child-focused public policy.
About Mothering Magazine
Mothering (www.mothering.com) celebrates the experience of parenthood as worthy of one's best efforts and fosters awareness of the immense importance and value of parenthood and family life in the development of the full human potential. Born in 1976 out of the need for the natural family community to learn about raising healthy children, Mothering was the birthplace of the natural family lifestyle. Read in more than 65 countries, Mothering is the only independently owned, family living magazine in the world addressing contemporary health, personal, environmental, medical, and lifestyle issues in an upbeat, intelligent, compassionate, and courageous way.